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Bengali Wedding Ritual
Dear Readers, my sincere apology that I can’t able to post since last 20 days- my sister marriage ceremony just over.
Hence wish to share you the story of Bengali Hindu Wedding ceremony.
In last 20 days I have observed how the ceremony leads reunion of family members and old friends. New relations are made and old ones get further strengthened. In this way, a marriage signifies the beginning of a new journey not just for the couple but for the entire family.
Let me walk you through some of the common rituals and traditional ceremonies we see in Bengali weddings.
PRE-WEDDING RITUALS
Patri-Patro: An auspicious day is chosen when the families of the bride ( Patro) and groom ( Patri) come together to finalize a date for the marriage.
- Ashirbaad:The parents and some close relatives of the bride visit the groom’s house to bless the groom and present him with gifts of gold ornaments. Usually, husked rice and trefoil are sprinkled on the bride’s head and bless the groom and the bride. A similar ceremony is held at the bride’s place.
- Ai Buro Bhaat: This refers to the last meal that the would-be bride consumes in her own house before getting married. Its kind of a mini-feast where all the realtives and friends join in the celebrations and wish her all the best. Ai Buddo Bhaat consists of typical Bengali fare like fish, rice, luchis (puri), vegetables and sweets such as sandesh, rasgullas etc. This ritual takes place in the home of the groom also.
Nandi Mukh:This is a ritual which is performed on the morning of the wedding just before the ‘gaye holud’ ceremony of the bride or the groom. It is performed in the homes of both parties. A priest chants Vedic incantations and the extended family pays homage to their forefathers. A small puja is performed for the well being of the ancestors in the afterlife and also to ask for their blessings.
Gaye Holud: A ceremony in which, the groom’s family visit the bride’s house to present her with the jewelry, other gifts and a pot of turmeric paste to be applied on the entire body of the bride. A similar ceremony is carried out at the groom’s house by the bride’s family.- Dodhi Mongol: On the morning of the wedding day, the bride and the groom take a bath with water provided by married females of the family. The bride is also made to adorn traditional red and white bangles and fed curd and rice by seven married women of her family.
Wait friends this is not end just beginning..let’s see what happened next.
MAIN WEDDING RITUALS
- Bor Jatri – The members of the groom’s house as well as his friends dress in their best attire and journey to the bride’s house where the wedding takes place.
- Bor Boron – When the bor jatri reaches the bride’s place, usually the mother of the bride along with other members come out to welcome the groom and his family by showing the holy earthen lamp, sprinkling trefoil, and husked rice placed on a bamboo winnow (kula).Then they are served sweets and drinks.
- Potto Bastra – After the groom is seated at the chadnatolla (wedding altar and canopy) – the sanctum sanctorum where only the groom, bride and the priest takes their place, the groom is offered new clothes by the person who is to do the sampradaan – a kind of gift to the boy from the girl’s side.
- Saat Paak – The bride, usually seated on a low wooden stool called pidi is lifted by her brothers and is taken round the groom in seven complete circles. The significance is they are winded up securely to each other.
- Mala Badal and Subho Distri – After the circles are completed, still sitting high on the piri, the bride and the groom exchange garlands of fragrant flowers thrice. This is the first step in which they accept each other. Bride and the groom are made to look at each other in front of all the assembled invitees. This exchange of loving glance is to initiate them to be together officially by the society.
- Sampradan – The bride then takes her place at the chadnatolla where an elderly male member of the bride’s family hands her over to the groom and the couple’s hands are bound by the sacred thread amidst recital of Vedic chants and are placed on the mangal ghot – a brass pitcher filled with water that is covered with mango leaves attached to one twig and a green coconut placed on it.
- Yagna – The bride and groom sit in front of the sacred fire and mantras after the priest. Agni, the fire god is made the divine witness to the marriage.
- Anjali – An offering to the fire is made. The bride’s brother puts puffed rice (khoi) in the hands of the bride, and the groom standing close to her holds her hands from the back and extends their arms forward. They then pour the offering into the fire together.
Sindoor Daan and Ghomta – Once again seated at their respective places in chadnatolla the groom applies sindoor or vermilion (a symbol of marriage worn by Hindu women thereafter) on the bride’s hair-parting. The bride then covers her head with a new sari offered by the groom as ghomta or veil.
Here is not the end ..!!
POST-WEDDING RITUALS
Bidaay – This is a farewell – mixed moment of joy and sorrow as the bride is bid adieu with blessings of her parents and relatives to start a new life with her beau.
Kaal Ratri – After the couple reaches the groom’s house and the initial welcome ceremony is over they are separated for the night, probably to get a refreshing sleep and prepare for the next day’s final wedding ceremony.
Bou Bhaat & Bodhu Boron – The girl cooks and serves all the members of her husband’s family. A banquet is held to treat the guests who lavish gifts on the new bride.
Phool Shojja – The couple is adorned with flowers and are left together alone in their room to enjoy conjugal bliss on a bed laid with flowers.
Oshto Mangala
On the eighth day after the marriage, the couple returns back to the home of the bride. It is a day of jollity for the family and sometimes, people are invited also to partake of that happiness and the family makes arrangements for a lunch.
In this way a new marriage life begins…!!!
Village of Painters: Patua: Narrative Scrolls from West Bengal, India
In West Bengal, India, a traditional caste community of artists, called patuas, paint colorful scrolls to accompany songs which they sing to relate historic, current, religious and cultural events to their audiences. These itinerant painter/singers are part of a long lineage that has passed the tradition down for generations.
In the past, patuas traveled long distances to perform in small villages, singing the songs and unrolling the scrolls panel by panel to accompany the narrative in exchange for food, clothing or payment. Now, many patuas perform in more populated areas for people who come to them to purchase their painted scrolls. While their work has been recognized by museums and universities around the world, the artists are still struggling to compete with other popular entertainment forms such as radio, television and movies. Over time, the artists have created repertoires of scrolls and songs that continue to engage their audiences, covering such topics as 9/11, the movie “The Titanic,” the tsunami in Indonesia and how to use a condom to prevent the spread of HIV and AIDS. Many of the scrolls have a moral or lesson which relates to the story.
To make a scroll, the patua begins with the paper. Artists use commercial poster paper, using one piece per frame of the scroll, sewing the pieces together. Once the pieces of paper have been assembled, the artist rolls the paper to make it conform to the proper shape. Most patuas use pencil to outline the forms of the characters and images. The individual frames are demarcated with decorative borders which disguise the seams between frames.
After the imagery and borders have been laid out, the painting begins. The scroll painters use available plants and minerals to them to make pigments for the paintings. The gum of the bel (wood apple) fruit acts as a fixative and as a binder. Some of the colors and their sources are white – lime powder, yellow – turmeric, black – lampblack or crushed, burnt rice, red – pomegranate juice or vermilion paste, blue – indigo, green – broad bean leaves. Some artists purchase commercial paints to use in their work. Similarly, many artists use brushes that they make out of goat and squirrel hair while others purchase ready made brushes
patua’s presentation.
The patuas’ official caste designation (or hereditary occupation) is “Chitrakar” or Picture Maker. The term patua and “Chitrakar” are interchangeable, though the artists generally use “Chitrakar “ as their surname even though they are not related to one another. Traditionally, patuas were men. Women have always assisted with the preparation of materials, but now they are also recognized as talented artists and performers in their own right. Female patuas play an important role in sharing information with women about issues that might be regarded as inappropriate topics of discussion between women and men.
As the scroll painters adapt their work to changing times and topics, their devotion to their trade can be seen in the following verse:
The Patua’s Creed
To speak the truth is our vow.
Our work will be to establish the truth.
We shall follow the path trodden by great men and women.
We shall serve the poor and downtrodden.
That will be our religion.
We shall speak the truth and not uphold the wrong.
It will spread the fragrance, the fragrance of the rose.
We will behave like human beings, not hating one another.
We shall light the way of truth, the light of truth will spread.
We shall overcome all malice and greed, all anger and lust.
To speak the truth is our vow.
Our work will be to establish the truth.
We shall follow the path trodden by great men and women.
We shall persuade men and women to act in a humane way,
To give up what is false in word and deed.
As the sunlight that shines on the daytime,
May we all become the light of goodness to everyone.
We shall honor those who are poor and oppressed.
Never shall we be unmindful of their sorrow.
We shall shun violence, speaking ill of others,
And spreading rumours.
To speak the truth is our vow,
And to follow the path trodden by great men and women
Arrange or Love-Marriage – Indian Culture
Love Marriage or Arrange Marriage –it’s a non-stoppable debate.
Heer Ranjha, Laila Majnu, Shirin Farhad, Romeo Juliet– famous character of history of love. Will we noticed why they are so famous- Answer is they never got married.
So what is going on your mind now? My dear friends! Is it concluding that Love is in the air till you get married? And after marriage it’s only marriage –no matter its love or arranged marriage!
Indian traditional society not want to appreciate Love Marriage as they thought it’s not marriage of two souls –Remembering Munnabhai style “ Chemical Locha”..!!
People who listen to their heart fall in love and settle for love marriage. Those who listen to their mind, go for arranged marriage-
-Interesting..!! So it’s a battle between of Heart and Mind.
So which is perfect? – My answer will no marriage is perfect in this world. Both love and arranged marriages have their own pros and cons.
It is important to understand and realize that both Husband and Wife are equally responsible to make successful Marriage Life.
According to me following are some facts may take a marriage successful.
- -Mutual Understanding and Decision making
- -Marry finances of both parents
- -No external influences of Family and Friends
- -Forget about past
- -Transparency
Negative of Love Marriage are Positive for Arranged Marriage and vice versa.
In love marriage both the individuals enter the institution of Marriage with great expectation whereas in arranged marriage it’s like plain paper so you can start from scratch.
In today’s world people fall in love numerous of time in life. So how many time my reader’s do.? Before marriage –may be in school life, college life, Neighborhood love or office love.
It is really confused me, when I try to find true love. With so many incident of falling love, at last, only mind can help us to make right choice in Love Marriage also.
“Listen to your Heart but Decide only from Mind.”
So here we may conclude:
Nothing is perfect in the world .It is in our hand only to make it perfect. Situation is also play a
crucial role in our decision making on marriage. Evaluate the merits and demerits of both concept and remember to take decision from your Mind only.
Tune Up Success 